stay happy!

"A human being is part of a whole, called by us the 'universe', a part limited in time and space. He experiences himself, his thoughts and feelings, as something separate from the rest - a kind of optical delusion of his consciousness. This delusion is a kind of prison for us, restricting us to our personal desires and to affectation for a few people near us. Our task must be to free ourselves from this prison by widening our circles of compassion to embrace all living creatures and the whole of nature in its beauty."

"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."

-Albert Einstein

I've been told recently that I'm a really negative person, that I'm really pessimistic, and that I always think of the worst case scenario and get paranoid way too easily. So this is going to be my attempt at showing that I do think positively about things sometimes. Besides, I think we all need to remember to smile sometimes - so here are a few things that make me smile:

1. Soy cappucinos when my nose is cold and red... They warm me up beautifully. When I don't know what to do next, the first step is a soy cappucino, it gives me a focus, and when I'm feeling scattered, that magical drink calms me down.

2. My little Alba, who is always so happy to see me after my year in Australia that she pees herself - they way she curles up next to my tummy and falls asleep, the way she runs around in circles and darts from one corner of the room to the other when she's hyper, the way she insists on eating grapefruit, oranges, seaweed, and spicy things because she wants to eat what I eat.

3. Having little secrets that I know I will soon tell a person, like when I gave Sidhaesh his birthday present and told him he'll know when he's allowed to open it (boy was he surprised!), or when I didn't let on that I am Thai to those customers at Spaghetti tree that time.

4. Attention from my dearest: text messages, stroking hair, little kisses, that cup of coffee in the morning, fleeting glances, surprise appearances, hugs, photos, cards, smiles, special dinners, talking about me to friends, gentle words, holding hands, 'good-morning phonecalls'... and all those little details that seem so trivial

5. Babies! I love my little nephews, niece, and I love seeing little children where I work, or on a train, at the park, etc. Playing with the little people is the best thing to do in the world! And when they smile for you, it's the most rewarding thing!

6. Summer, warmth. It doesn't have to be sunny (in fact, I love a warm summer rain) - but just ... I don't want to have to think about carrying around a jacket, a sweater, thick socks... The only thing I want in my hand is yours, and the only thing I want on my feet is the sand.

*** *** *** *** ***

Been feeling guilty for my avoidance of MUISS, NLC, etc. Recently, I've been bumping into the student unionists at Monash, and they are all incredibly surprised that I'm not running in the elections, that I'm no longer involved... That I never really wanted to do any of it, even!

Ofcourse, I feel that I've gained so much more perspective on life now that I'm looking at the foolishness of the last couple years. But - no regrets - definitely gained some skills there! But in truth, I think the one thing missing in most student reps in compassion and empathy for the students... that only seems to come in after the term is over, and agendas are forgotten.

So what's this truth that I've learned about student representation? Why do I feel that no real work is being done?

Ego.

Simple as that. It's in the way - and being an office bearer only accentuates it. Now that I'm out of MUISS, I'm doing more to help my fellow students than I ever was before - and I've learned that it's not the structures that are in place that are really helping - it's the networks that we form by ourselves. And to think - how important I used to think it all was!

Now that I'm out of it all, it's so clear how little difference any of these organisations really makes, and how few people even know of their existence.

... but nonetheless, I feel guilty. I feel sorrow at the friends I could have had had it not been for the whole student-union affair gone sour

... yet, happy for the lessons it has taught me

for what it's worth, I truly wish everyone well...

*** *** *** *** ***

Hey... who knows something about Jehovah's Witnesses? We had a group of 34 at the restaurant last night who'd just finished some 3-day convention. I wouldn't have guessed they were very 'Godly' people, because essentially, they looked like a bunch of very good-looking people who were extremely 'well-oiled' and happy. All the girls - kids included - wore only dresses, and all the men (again, kids included) wore suits. Is that somehow part of the religion? Cristelle was saying that the Jehovah's Witnesses that come to her house also always wear dresses. Maybe it's just coincidence? I don't know - Hopefully I'm not offending anyone - I'm just curious is all.

As a group of people to serve (ofcourse this should have nothing to do with religion) they were rather 'well-behaved' (except the kids were clearly spoiled and got kinda all-over-the-place towards the end of dinner), but super-stingy with the tips ($1.70!), considering how much special attention they demanded! Oh, well, can't always win :P

Stressed?

Hey... I know we are both working hard and stressed... but let's keep that in mind so we don't take it out on one another?

Stress just builds on stress... no point!

**edit**: a reply to Neko:

"But really this mind of ours is already unmoving and peaceful - really peaceful! Just like a leaf which remains still so long as the wind doesn't blow. If a wind comes up, the leaf flutters. The fluttering is due to the wind - the fluttering of the mind is due to those sense imporessions; the mind follows them. If it doens't follow them, it doesn't flutter. If we know fully the true nature of our sense impressions, we will be unmoved."

- Ajahn Chah

(ok, that was cheating - it's a weekend away from Monday :P)

aleX bell live!

Monday baby!

Your idea of bliss is to wake up on a Monday morning knowing you haven't a single engagement for the entire week. You are cradled in a white paper cocoon tied up with typewriter ribbon.

*** *** ***Ande Rebref


Maybe I won't do the sexy voiced "Happy Birthday Mr. President", but in any case, I'll take this opportunity to deviate from my Monday themed song/quote and mentally sing a birthday song for Daeshy:

"Happy Birthday to you..."

Ok, you know the rest... And if you don't, it's time to consider coming out of that cave already, or stop playing so many online games [edit: not you, daeshy, - that's directed to anyone who's been so out of touch with the world so as not to know the birthday song...]!

Anyhow, poor Daeshy is sick, and his birthday is on a Monday... talk about a rocky start to the year! I tried to be nice by bringing over this huge slice of chocolate mud-cake after work and gathering everyone (ie, his two housemates and Sanjiv who's temporarily living in the living room) around at midnight and getting Daeshy to blow out two candles... well... it was a nice surprise, but seeing as Sid is sick, he only had a bite, whilst Jeremy ate half the cake and all the cream.

I should have taken a picture... Who needs TV when you can watch Jeremy eat? While Daeshy and Vijay were absorbed in the brazil - australia women's football match on TV, I was staring at the blissful manner in which Jeremy devoured his piece of cake. You can't *not* get happy when you see him eat! It's incredible!

But I digress... my apologies... This post is about Sidhaesh, and how he should have a happy happy day today.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

**EDIT: PICS from Last Night (Monday night) - Dinner at Soul Mama**


Mouths Full!


Everyone too engrossed in their meals to take a proper group photo


The famed spectacle of Mr. Jeremy Goh and his meal... here seen in less than usual splendour


Vijay was doing that on purpose...


Also, a quick recognition of two other birthdays that happened over the weekend:

HAPPY BIRTHDAY to Bec (20) and Clark (27) (at European Beer Bar - I stopped over for 15 minutes after work on Saturday night)



Bec looks so nice in this Pic!



SCARY picture...



*** *** ***

Just on another note... I caught up with the missing Miss Ginny Loh over the weekend - finally! Life's been tough for her, man.

Before that, I had one hell of a hectic week, but I survived it - got in all my assignments on time, plus I think I did well, too... But I had to work on my survey all weekend, which means I'm feeling exhausted, and need a day to relax, but the week is just starting! There's an essay due in today, which I haven't looked at because I was working on the survey....

There's a birthday dinner to attend tonight....

There's the monolingual part of my survey to design on Tuesday, and Wednesday to administer it, as well as work in the evening (seeing as my monolinguals are in the city, may as well kill two birds with one stone and go to work as well!).... And another assessment for Thursday. *sigh*

But that's all ahead. It'll be fine. My time-management skills have definitely improved since my first-year days.

Last night I had this beautiful dream - about a blind little boy, and his deaf grandfather, and this incredible bond they had. The grandfather would play piano for the little boy every day, and teach him to play, even though he couldn't hear it. And then the old man started going blind, too, and has trouble looking after the little child... and was afraid the boy would stop loving him...

but then I woke up, and I was in the Spaghetti Tree telling Clark and Crystelle that I need to write down my dream before I forget it. Then my alarm clock rang, and I really woke up (In bed - *phew*!)...

... but it's time to start this crazy week...

So who wrote the quote? No googling it!!!

Beta blogger

Blogger went on a new Beta version on Monday, and I'm absolutely spewing that I can't make the switch yet (they are slowly migrating people over). So I decided to start a new account just so that I can start mucking about with it. So, from now on, (I think), I'm going to start using this address . It's linked back to this site, though, in case I change my mind :P

Another song about Monday

Mmm when you can go out late from Monday,
till Saturday turns into Sunday,
and now you're back here at Monday,
so we can do it all over again.
And you go aah ah ah
I want a refund,
I want a light,
I want a reason,
to make it through the night, alright.

A prize for whoever guess what this song is!

(p.s. for anyone wondering, last weeks song was Monday Monday by the Mamas and the Papas)

Whatever were we waiting for? I must say that this past weekend was the most unproductive weekend academically ever (and I'm not helping the situation by blogging now!)... but I think there's been some progress in chasing some of those skeletons out of the closet!

A couple exciting things happened since last week...

I got my exchange application in two weeks ago, as you may or may not know... and then found out last Tuesday that NUS doesn't accept honours exchange applicants. Great. I'm still waiting to see if that's true, though.

Wednesday: I spoke to Arzel (after 3 years!!!)

Arzel is just one of those super-friends that I'll probably never forget :) I remember when we were working in the same restaurant, and one night I had a really bad rash on my leg (very painful!) from an allergy or something like that... and I could hardly walk. But I'd told my parents to come to eat at Dennis (which is where Arzel and I both worked, and thus, where we met) that night because I was about to go off to Spain...

Anyhow, point was, I could hardly walk, was in extreme pain, couldn't call in sick cos I told my parents to come that night... and Arzel pretty much covered the whole place on his own and left me to just deal with my mom and dad!

But yeah.... when am I coming back to Finland? I don't know, Arzel... but you're somebody I definitely have to catch up with SOON!!

Thursday: Went to see Pen-Ek Ratanaruang's "Invisible Waves" with Tenzing and Richard... must say I think Khun Ratanaruang should stick to his Thai roots and give up trying to make Japanese existentialist movies. Didn't enjoy it much... His previous films, 'Mon-Rak Transistor' and 'Last Life in the Universe' were quality films... but this... oh, well... :(

Friday: Well... back to the whole incident of the unproductive weekend, I suppose...

I'd planned it so carefully that I would be able to go to work, go see "Be With Me" (An absolutely BEAUTIFUL Singaporean movie) and do three assignments... but instead? Chased skeletons instead of doing the assignments, which I'm meant to be doing ... now. :P

But really, the important thing is that we really managed to make some things a lot clearer... so it was definitely worth it...




In the middle of all that, though, there was the incident of Miss Ginny Loh reappearing on the face of this planet (and then calling me), after 6 months missing! I'm happy she's back! And I'll be seeing her next weekend...

And at work... These Thai people came to have drinks and dessert... and I wasn't serving them, except for just helping to drop some stuff at the tables... I didn't let on that I was Thai though, and it led to some interesting results.

I was dropping a tiramisu off at the table, and these guys started openly commenting on my looks (positive comments, YAY!) in Thai. I smiled and pretended not to understand, ofcourse.

I told Clark about this, so we formulated a plan... I taught him how to say "Sawasdeekhrap" (Hello) in Thai, and so he went to them and greeted them. This group was then very impressed, and asked him where he had learned it from.

"Oh, from my colleague, Fon, the girl you were just talking about in Thai."

They were in hysterics (especially the girls in their group!).

It's useful to look different sometimes, isn't it?

The Monday Pundit and Anti-U.S.? - Just Do It!

Monday, Monday, so good to me
Monday mornin', it was all I hoped it would be
Oh Monday mornin', Monday mornin' couldn't guarantee
That Monday evenin' you would still be here with me

Lol... maybe that doesn't quite fit the situation - except the "Monday Monday" part


Taking you all back to that night I went to the Nott like two weeks ago or so. I was talking to this first year philosophy student about veganism. I've been laughing at her deliciously irrelevant argument ever since, and I just feel like sharing that.

Me: If I knew that the cows were not caged all their lives, or that chickens weren't constantly in coops, then I'd drink milk and have eggs. After all, the stressed chickens peck out each others eyes and the depressed and bored pigs and cows are known to start chewing off their neighbours ears

Her: But there is no other way - society oppresses all of us. There is no other way for the cows and the chickens.

Me: Ever heard of free range?

Her: It's been proven that it's good for cows to milk them. Otherwise their udders hurt!

Me:... Ummm.... Huh?


Thank god there were other people around to talk to who weren't quite as incoherently drunk.

I still wonder where the comment about milking cows comes from? I wonder if some little imp was standing on her shoulder whispering in her ear: "The reason you shouldn't drink milk is cos the cow doesn't like to be milked!"

And the other argument? On the surface, still somewhat coherent... but seriously, how apathetic is it?

P1. Society oppresses us all.
P2. We have no choice but to live in society
C1. Therefore we have no choice but to accept that we are oppressed.

Sounds positively Foucaultian. I did recommend her to read Foucault. She may love him.

***

On another note: A came by from Sydney over the weekend. 'twas fun. Yesterday, we (A, T, S) were just enjoying the Melbourne weather (which behaved for a change).

At some stage, we passed the state library, where there was an anti-US, anti-war protest going on.

Ok... first, you need to know what T was wearing. He's a bit of a designer nut, so he wasn't wearing anything without a brandname on it somewhere. But most glaringly, perhaps, was his jacket, with a huge NIKE plastered in front.

Now that you know that, I'll tell you what T did. T sees the protests as we emerge from Melbourne Central onto Swanston street, and like a little child running to a candy store (Thanks to S for the analogy), he speeds to the protest, and doesn't return for 15 minutes. A, S and I were beginning to wonder if he was still alive, when, with a huge grin on his face, he emerges from the foray.

Dood! Not cool!

And, on a final note...

Daeshy:
Two days a week is WAY TOO LITTLE to see each other! *sulk, sulk*

Blogging restrictions

I spend far too much time procrastinating on the internet, especially with the help of my blog. Henceforth, until the end of this semester, I shall limit myself to posting only once per week. I shall only allow myself to blog on Mondays from now on.

Today is not Monday.

Over and out.